Bullying isn't just limited to the school playground. The problem with school bullies is that they grow up, get jobs, and move into management. Unfortunately, bullying in the workplace can cause low self-esteem, depression, and even drive some people to attempt suicide. So what should you do if you find yourself working for a bully?

Bullies are often bright individuals who, because they are not restricted like most of us by our consciences, are able to use all manner of underhand and devious methods to get ahead in their careers. The sorts of behaviours to look out for include: being verbally abusive, making threats, distorting the facts or even outright lying to make you look bad; persistent unfounded fault-finding and criticism - often delivered in a way that seeks to humiliate you; putting unreasonable pressure on you - for example, shortening deadlines or increasing the workload; failing to include you (or deliberately excluding you) from communication, meetings, training or other activities.

If you find yourself being singled out for maltreatment that is affecting your physical or psychological health, then you need to take action. The most important thing to realise about being bullied is that you are not at fault. Even though the bully may blame you, it is not because you are not good enough. In fact, the opposite is often true. Targets of bullying are often above average in their popularity, competence, and diligence - because these traits typically bring about feelings of envy in the bully. In most cases, bullies have a psychological need to exploit other people in order to address their own insecurities. They are jealous people who experience no remorse. They enjoy exploiting their power and do it to feel good about themselves. So understand that, unless you take action, the bully is unlikely to stop.

Your first step is to talk to a mentor, an external coach, or perhaps even a sympathetic but objective colleague. Such an individual can act as a sounding board, helping you to analyse your situation, and provide you with advice on whether to confront the bully or seek third-party advice.

Whichever course of action you pursue, you will need evidence to support your argument. So keep detailed notes with dates of instances of harassment or maltreatment. If you have any physical evidence - such as emails, memos, or even hand-scrawled notes - these could also constitute an important part of your case.

If you and your coach or colleague together believe that the problem can be handled without involving other people, you may decide to simply take a stand and confront your tormentor. Make sure that you approach such a discussion assertively, yet not aggressively. Avoid using the term 'bully' and try to stick to the facts. Talk them through the 'evidence' that you have collected and then ask for their reaction. You are likely to get one of two responses.

You may find that the bully is genuinely horrified by how you feel. They may be genuinely surprised by how they are perceived, apologise, and take immediate action to remedy the situation. In such circumstances, the individual is likely to be just an incompetent or oblivious manager as opposed to a deliberate bully.

On the other hand, the deliberate and conniving bully may also feign surprise, horror, or lack of awareness. They may then try to use their charm to make you think that you are actually the one at fault. But do not fall for that ruse.

If you do not feel that you can tackle the problem yourself, the next step is to speak to someone in your human resources or personnel department in confidence, and present your evidence to them. Together, you may decide to pursue action using the company's official grievance procedure, possibly involving the bully's line manager. However, if you work for a smaller business, you may not have the support of a full HR department. Or it may be that your HR department simply does not agree with your appraisal of the problem. In such cases, you could seek the advice of an external source (see panel).

Many victims of bullying feel that it is in some way their fault. But remember that bullies behave the way they do because they - not you - are psychologically or socially deficient. If you let them get away with it, they will perceive you as a soft target. So make sure that you stand up to it.

Dr Rob Yeung and David Cooper specialise in coaching and asssessment at Kiddy and Partners, business psychologists

• Your company's employee assistance programme (EAP) - ask to speak to a counsellor, explain the situation, and ask for their advice. www.successunlimited.co.uk - a website providing information and advice for people who are being bullied.
• The Citizen's Advice Bureau would be able to recommend other people you could talk to - for example, charities specialising in dealing with the impact of bullying.
• As a last resort, local solicitors may consider representing you, perhaps on a 'no win, no fee' basis, in pursuing a claim through the employment tribunal or High Court. But be aware of the significant time, financial cost and effort involved, not to mention the possibility of losing.